Nantucket Noel (2021)

Nantucket Noel debuted on The Hallmark Channel on Nov. 19, 2021, as part of Countdown To Christmas.

IMDb rating: 6.0 (as of Dec. 29, 2021)

Christina owns a toy store she inherited from her mother on a rundown wharf on Nantucket Island. The wharf loses a foot or two a year to the encroaching ocean, and half the boards on the wooden walkway are rotted through. This place is one bad Nor’easter away from being swept into the Atlantic.

A developer wants to buy the wharf, tear it down and replace it with a new structure. Christina can’t let go of the precious mural her dearly departed mother painted on one of the walls when she opened the store and refuses his entreaties.

Andy is a workaholic divorcee for his father’s development company. His ex-wife begrudgingly allows him to take their precocious daughter (nicknamed Wink) on a working vacation to Nantucket so he can show her the ins and outs of how to ruin people’s lives.

Andy arrives on the island and scopes out the wharf. Wink begs her dad to let her visit the toy store, and she promptly shoplifts a mermaid. When Andy finds out, he punishes her by pawning her off on Christina for a few hours each day so she can “work off” her debt to society. Christina gets free child labor, and he gets free babysitting. Win-win.

Christina tries to organize resistance, but most of the other store-owners have already cashed the checks (cha-ching!!) and are busy plotting how they’re going to blow this wad of cash.

Andy suggests she move her store to Main Street, where she’ll get more foot traffic and customers won’t have to worry about falling into the ocean. But Christina stubbornly refuses to budge and resents his meddling so much she goes shopping for a Christmas tree with Andy and Wink and then offers to help decorate the tree at their house.

Andy’s father sees Christina putting an angel on top of the tree and blows a gasket. He accuses her of seducing his son in an attempt to stop the development and promises her that he won’t change his mind no matter how many sexual favors she promises his son.

A lifetime of accumulated guilt catches up to the old man, and he decides to turn the business over to Andy before his acid-ridden gut spontaneously combusts.

Despite going on a romantic seaside walk with Christina the day before, Andy forges ahead with the project. This apple didn’t fall far from the tree.

Forced to accept the inevitable, Christina agrees to the old man’s offer and moves into another location on Main Street. Andy decides to stay on Nantucket until the project is complete.

Relationship update: Christina tries to make it work, but festering resentment over losing her business eats away at their relationship, and she calls it quits before the new wharf is finished.

Actual review: This movie lacked heart, a good script and any sense of cohesion. The love story was clunky, and the two leads had zero chemistry. The dad was a rude jerk from beginning to end. Trevor Donovan seemed to be mailing this one in while awaiting his move to GAC Family TV in 2022.

My IMDb rating: 4 stars out of 10.

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